Take Time Out For You

I think that it's really important that when you live with your other half, to not neglect having your "alone time." Just because you live together it does not mean that you need to constantly live out of each other's pockets and be around each other 24/7. If you do, this is when tensions can arise. Having time to yourself is of major importance because not only does it mean that you are still taking time out to do the things that you enjoy, but that the time you spend with your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife is all the more special. 

The last thing you want to do when you're living with your partner is to end up resenting them! 

Boyfriend and I are in a position where on a day-today basis, we don't really know how much we are going to see each other. Last year, over the summer, we barely saw each other once a week. He is a very clever thing and was off at university working extremely hard on finishing his PhD. He needed that time to focus. And I 100% respected that. He called the shots on when we saw each other. It had to be that way. 

And now that we live together, the dynamics have changed again. We both work. But our schedules are completely different. I'm on regular hours that don't ever change. And he can be working anything from 8 to 12 hour days (sometimes more.) The time we spend together is precious. And it means that the time we have apart when neither of us are working needs to be spent taking time out to really relax and focus on the most important people in our lives....us. 

On Tuesday night, Boyfriend was out all day and for most of the evening. So I took the opportunity to have a completely girlie pamper evening. I had been out during the day with a friend, and picked up a few bits to help me indulge my beauty-holic side. 

I ran myself a hot bath, popped in a LUSH Golden Egg bath ballistic and was swept away into relaxation. I picked up a really indulgent Montagne Jeunesse Chocolate Orange face mask, and followed up with my brand new LUSH Ultrabland  Facial Cleanser. I switched my phone to silent, and spent a good half an hour soaking all my cares away. 

When I have a bath, I take the opportunity to banish any stresses or problems that I have. If I want to cry, I cry. If I want to sing, I sing, and if I want to laugh, then I just go ahead and let the giggles out. Nobody can hear me. It's my time to just completely be at one with myself. If you're in a relationship and you do live together, you do not want to be bringing your own stresses into the mix. Especially when you don't know how your other half is feeling. Boyfriend is a very intuitive person, and if there is ever something bugging me, even if I don't say anything, he knows. And if I don't want to talk about it. He really takes it to heart. And that makes me feel awful. He thinks it's something he's done. Which isn't the case at all. Because when it comes to our relationship, we are completely honest with each other when it comes to things that piss us off.

After my bath, I heated myself up some leftover pizza I'd had boxed up from my Pizza Express lunch, and turned the living room into a cinema. I put Frozen on, turned out all the lights, and munched on chocolate chip cookies. And it felt so good. I was relaxed. I was happy. And above all. I was really looking forward to Boyfriend getting home. 

We all need time for just us. It's okay for you to have that time or to ask for that time. Don't feel that just because you live with somebody, you need to dedicate all your time to them and only them. That's not a healthy relationship at all. 

And it works both ways. Make sure your other half gets their own time Even if it's watching Match of the Day, letting them do their thing in the kitchen (this is one of Boyfriend's favourite ways to de-stress,) or making sure that they have a night out with their friends. Maybe your boy/girl really wants to do something for themselves, but is shy about telling you in case they upset you. Be intuitive and make the move first. Let them know that it's okay to have that time. 

Because the only way we can truly love others, is if we love ourselves first. 

The Boyfriend Tag

After the success of Boyfriend featuring in some of my Ginger Vlogs over on my JustAddGinger YouTube channel, I thought it would be really fun to do The Boyfriend Tag together as a bit of a Valentine's Day Special. 

If you haven't seen it yet, here is the finished product....

The Boyfriend Tag Questions. 

1. Where did we meet? 

2. What was our first date? 

3. Where was our first kiss and how was it? 

4. Did you know that I was the one? 

5. First impression? 

6. When did you meet the family? 

7. Do we have a tradition?

8. What was our first road-trip?

9. Who said I love you first and where were we? 

10. What do we argue about the most?

11. Who wears the pants in the relationship?

12. If I'm sitting in front of the TV what am I watching? 

13. What dressing do I get on my salad?

14. What's the one food don't I like?

15. We go out to eat what do I get to drink 

16. What size shoe do I wear? 

17. If I was collecting anything what would it be? 

18. What is my favourite type of sandwich? 

19. What would I eat everyday if I could?

20. What my favourite cereal? 

21. What is my favourite music? 

22. What's my favourite sports team?

23. what is my eye colour?

24. Who is my best friend? 

25. What is something that I do that you don`t like?

26. What is my heritage?

27. You bake me a cake for my birthday. What kind do you make?

28. Did I play sports? 

29. What could I spend hours doing? 

30. What is one unique talent that I have? 










Psss..... Here are the Bloopers from our Boyfriend Tag video.....

Valentine's Day Gift Guide - For Him

Valentine's Day will be upon us in just a few short weeks.

If - like me - this is the first Valentine's Day you'll be spending with a new special someone, then chances are you may be sitting there racking your brains about what to get them as a gift.

With this in mind, I decided to put together a small selection of gift ideas that may provide you with some inspiration.

1. Pampering: For our first Valentine's Day together, Boyfriend & I are going to be taking a trip to the LUSH Spa in Liverpool for a double treatment (don't worry, he knows we are already.) He works really hard in his job, and deserves to be pampered so I thought I'd take a chance and book us both in for something special so that we both get some "me" time but spend quality time together.

Having a spa day/break will help you both get uber-relaxed and wash all outside stresses away. There are so many wonderful spas and treatments out there that no doubt you will find one that suits both you & your boyfriend/husband.

2. Champagne: If he likes to indulge in  some yummy bubbles, selecting a really beautiful bottle of champagne/prosecco could be the perfect gift. Especially if it comes in one of those very chic and fancy wooden boxes or plush bottle-jackets. It's something you could share together to toast your relationship, or save for another special occasion.

Ps. Don't forget to save the cork as a keepsake of this special day!

3. Love Letters: If you want to create a really personal gift to give to him, then why not make a special token of your love that can be kept forever. Simply find a jar (mason/jam etc...) make sure it is clean, and fill it with pieces of paper that say something special that you love about your man. They could be attributes he has, memories of amazing adventures you've had together, or photos with captions. You can keep adding to the jar so that it is jam-packed full of love letters for him to look at.

4. Clothing: If you have been together for a little while and you are confident you could shop for your man, then clothing is a great option as a gift - especially graphic print t shirts. You can make the choice really personal to his taste, and he'll be really impressed that you've listened to him talk about his favourite band/TV show/film.

5. Books: Again, this gift idea will depend on how long you two have been together and how well you know his tastes. Even if you aren't sure what to go for, you can go in to your local bookshop and ask the staff what their recommendations would be. Keep a look out for book-signing events that may be happening in your area from authors he may like, or go to antique book shops or fairs and look out for a really rare book he may enjoy looking at. Then sit back and watch him smell the musty, aged scent of the pages, or cheekily flip to the back to read the ending.

PS. You could also write a personal message of love in the front of the book to make it really sentimental.

6. A Watch: He may not be in to jewellery, but having a classic, timeless timepiece on his wrist could make him feel extra-chic and professional. Buying a watch for him doesn't necessarily have to be expensive. There are some great ones out there for really reasonable prices that will instantly add a little something extra to his office wear/everyday attire. He could even keep it as an accessory he brings out on special occasions when he wants to feel dapper.

Ps. Some shops will even have the option for you to get the watch engraved with a meaningful message.

7. Plan A Trip: It doesn't have to be anywhere fancy or overseas. It could be a night recreating where you first met, or had your first date, or knew you were in love. Or it could be simply sitting down together and planning a special trip for later in the year. Either way, it'll be an adventure you can go on together and create new, happy memories.

Let me know your plans/gift ideas for Valentine's Day this year in the comments.

2014: New Year Resolutions

2013 really was an amazing year. I learnt so much about myself. Became more confident. Became stronger. And met some wonderful people along the way. 

For this year, I wanted to continue on my voyage of self-discovery and make some resolutions that were just for me. I'm not ashamed to admit that I do stress a lot about things in my life. I get anxious. I get worried. And sometimes with a bus day-to-day schedule these things are inescapable. So by making a few "Me Time" resolutions, I can make sure I remember to take time out from the craziness of life, and have some time to refresh.

Exercise: I can't tell you the last time I went to the gym. Bad, I know. But now I have joined the gym (I got a year membership for my birthday,) so there is no excuse. Even if it's just once or twice a week, I'm going to make sure I get some quality workout time in to each week. 

Healthy Body, Healthy Mind: Currently, the house looks like an explosion in a chocolate factory. There are piles of boxes, packets and tubes everywhere. Over the holidays I have put on a few lbs, and it has got to me. But instead of diving in to a massive diet, I'm going to take it slow. Cut out the chocolate-gorging, drink more water, do more home-cooking and make friends with the fruit bowl. A healthy diet will not only help my body feel better, but make my mind clearer too. 

Schedule: My blogging of late has become a bit erratic. I tried to fit uploading posts in between a jam-packed schedule and this meant that everything became out of sync and spontaneous. It's my January mission to find a scheduling system that works for me, and stick to it throughout the year. I love my blog-baby. It's my escapism. I need to claim that back. 

Love: Love is really important. I want to make sure I take as much time as I can to show the special people in my life how much I love them. Even if I don't get to see them that much, the time we do spend together I want to be super-special so that even when we aren't together, they know how much they mean to me.

What are your resolutions for 2014?

Blogtember 2013: Deception

 Creative writing day: write a (very short) fictional story that starts with this sentence: "To say I was dreading the dinner party would be the understatement of the century."

The story does not necessarily need to have a conclusion - you can leave your readers wishing for more!

To say I was dreading the dinner party would be the understatement of the century. 

I hated big social occasions. They made me feel claustrophobic. So many faces, all laughing and smiling and joking, pretending to share a mutual bond over the latest runway show they had attended in Paris, or gloating over the fact that Margaret had to get corrective surgery again on her nose after the surgeon botched the first job. 

It was all a load of crap. The falseness. The lies. The bullsh*t. 

But I was there for Simon. Playing my part of the dutiful wife. It was important I did. He needed me. Put on the make up, zip up the cocktail dress, and paint on the smile for one night and then it would be over. 

Reaching for a flute of champagne as a waiter floated past, I headed for the balcony. I needed air. Oh who was I kidding? I needed a cigarette. Alcohol and nicotine. They were the only things that would calm me down. 

The cool summer breeze caressed my cheek and I instantly felt soothed. Fumbling with the clasp of my purse I scrambled inside to find the pack of cigarettes. To my luck there was one solitary soldier left. I fished him out with relish, then dug back in to my bag in search of a lighter. 

"Do you need a light?" His voice. Soft, and smooth, like honey, drifted into my ears. I would know that voice anywhere. I put the cigarette to my lips and let him light in. I inhaled slowly, enjoying the taste of the nicotine. It calmed me instantly. 

"I'd hoped I'd catch you out here," he murmured. The sound of his voice send a shiver up my spine. 

I felt him draw closer to me. It made me nervous. He made me nervous. I took a long, hard drag of my cigarette and kept my eyes forward. I couldn't catch his eye. I couldn't let him sense my fear. Half-scared and half-excited I was glued to the spot.  

The sound of the balcony door sliding open made us both turn. For a moment I caught a glimpse of him. Pressed grey suit, emerald tie, two-day-stubble. He looked like a god in the dusky haze. 

"Oh there you are you two. You'd better finish off your sneaky fags. There about to serve dinner. And you know how David gets when dinner is served late." 

The door slid shut. 

That was Rachel for you. Always a stickler for time and routine. Always desperate to stay on the good side of her husband. Living on tenter hooks trying to be the perfect housewife, the perfect hostess. But in reality, she was just a robot. 

"Come on, we'd better get back." His dulcet tones filtered into my ear and I gasped in delight. His whispers sent another shiver through me. He moved his lips from my ear and gave me a singular kiss on the cheek, his hand running up my arm slowly. 

"Your husband will wonder where you've got to."

 ....

Blogtember 2013: A Poem for Person X

Write a public love letter to someone in your life. (It doesn't necessarily need to be romantic.)

Dear Person X, 

You're the one I'll always turn to,  

When blue sky turns to grey.  

The one I'll always dream of,  

at the ending of the day.  

You're the one who'll always make me laugh,  

When my head has does nought but frown.  

No matter how you're feeling,  

For me you'll act the clown.  

You're the one I love to kiss goodnight,  

You're the one I love to hold.  

You're the one who warms my cold reptilian heart,  

Amidst the Autumn cold.  

You're the one I can talk to all night,  

Whether deep in thought or talking sh*t. 

You're the one I can rant at when I'm stressed,  

You make no big deal of it.  

Thank you for making me so happy, 

Thank you for being you.  

Thank you for how you make me feel.  

Please know how much I do love you!  

Xxx

The Romance Tag

I think all of the people who know me well, know just how much of a romantic person I am...I am a sucker for that crazy little thing we call love, and go all mushy at the sight of anything romantical. I am not ashamed to admit that I cry at romantic films, books, and even songs. 

I am a big, fat ball of ginger mush! 

Mmmm.....such a sexy image! 

I really wanted to do a "Romance Tag". I couldn't find many out there, so thought I'd create my own one....so here we go! 

1) Favourite romantic film?

"Gone with the Wind", all the way. This is one of my ALL TIME favourite films. The passion between Rhett and Scarlett is just amazing, and the final scenes never fail to make me cry! 

2) Idea of a perfect date?

If this is a date where there are no limitations, I would be picked up in an amazing car by my date, whisked away to a beautiful spot in the countryside or at the coast, and we'd sit and have a picnic at dusk and watch the sun go down, then go for a moonlit wander and look at the stars. And of course, I'd be wearing a fabulous outfit and there'd be a small orchestra playing in the background. 

3) Favourite leading man in film/literature? 

Heathcliff from "Wuthering Heights"! Always and forever. To me, Heathcliff is the epitome of everything beautiful and romantic (except for the doomed love part.) I mean, c'mon, The poor guy is in love with one woman for his whole life, and goes away to prove that he is the kind of person worthy of being with her. Cathy and Heathcliff's love is doomed, but 100% unquestionably true. They were made for each other. What girl doesn't want a love like that? 

4) Favourite heroine in literature? 

Catherine from "Northanger Abbey". She is a fantasist and a dreamer, always losing herself in fiction. She goes through a bit of a rubbish time to bag the man of her dreams, and thinks all hope is gone, then finds a happy ending. If I could put myself in anybody's shoes, it would be hers. Love isn't love without a bit of an adventure.

5) Favourite love song? 

When I was younger, my ultimate love song was "Kissing You" by Des'ree from the "Romeo & Juliet" soundtrack. I LOVE that film, and the song is so fitting. just thinking about it makes me feel stupidly emotional. "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls has always been a favourite. Every time I hear it I get that fuzzy feeling in my tummy.

6) Romantic film guaranteed to make you cry? 

OMG there are too many...I cry a bit too easily. Probably number 1 is "Gone with the Wind", then "Romeo & Juliet"...."Up" is another one, and I've also been known to cry in episodes of "Buffy" (even though it's not a film!)

7) Have you ever been in love? 

Yes! Absolutely!! And there is no better feeling!

8) Kisses or cuddles? 

Both. Cuddles are amazing because they make me feel all safe and secure, and completely untouchable to anything else. Kisses are best when they are spontaneous....I'm not into big PDA's, so for me, kissing is best if you are alone with your significant other, but if you are with somebody, and they just HAVE to kiss you right then and there, then that's pretty spectacular. 

9) What's the best way to sweep you off your feet? 

Just make me feel needed and wanted. Having somebody there, listening to what you say and caring about it, surprising you with small things if you are having a shitty day, or being there for you when you need a shoulder to cry on, or somebody to vent at. Of course, a big "sweep" would be surprising me with a love letter, an unexpected date to dinner, or being whisked away for a romantic weekend. 

10) What's the best way to be romantic? 

To be spontaneous. If you want to be with somebody, tell them. If you are thinking about somebody, let them know. If you love somebody, don't tell them out of habit, tell them when they least expect to hear it and when you really feel it. Plan things to do with your partner from time to time that are a little bit away from the norm to bring some adventure into your relationship. Surprise them with small gestures to show that you care....run them a bath, give them a massage, or even just hold them if they've had a crap day! Make them feel like the most important person in the world. There's no better feeling for anybody than knowing how special they are! At least that's what I think.

Ginger x